I kinda realized last night that someone I had been going on dates with is no longer someone I want to continue going on dates with... It was one of those unexplainable but impossible-to-ignore feelings. Anyway. Because I hate that conversation, you know, the one that in more or less words says 'I don't like you', I am in this dreaded position of anxiety which if I were actually fully conscious of it, I would be able to better deal with it. So as I wait to return his call for the evening, I know how the next verbal contact will ensue... and he has NO idea. Thus the dreaded-ness of the position. It's also a bit deceitful isn't it. Like I am moving on behind his back.
Anyway, in my unconscious state of anxiety, I restlessly struggled for things to do today. Then I hit the fabric store. Bought $20 worth of adorable cotton-poly prints and went to town on a purse-creating extravaganza. After I finished that I began baking, the likes of which no innocent reader should be subject to know. and when my sister finally got the nerve up to ask what my deal was, my mother's 'protectory' instinct immediately kicked in and she retorted ' Leave her alone. She's workin through it.'
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